The male body shape may seem a distant dream and I have little option but to wait on the NHS doing its thing at its regulated pace of a dead snail.
I refuse to think negative and succumb to the ‘there’s nothing I can do’ mind set. So what can I do?
For the last six months I have been swallowing a whole heap of dietary vitamin and mineral supplements that are recommended for boosting testosterone. I am huge on alternative medicine anyway so finding a natural solution would make me a right happy bunny. Can it really be done? I guess the answer is yes and no. I can see a difference in how the facial hair is growing and it is certainly thicker and longer than it was but the much longed for moustache is not happening.
I have also started a diet and training regime. I need to shed weight anyway and body working with weights will build more defined muscles. I enjoy working out anyway it gets me pumping for the day. Diet – well that means I have to eat more oddly enough as dysphoria and stress both kill my appetite meaning I rarely eat more than one meal a day and that can be a strain. Now I am working out again my metabolism wants fuel so this where my battle with self is now. So far I am winning and have lost a few inches except on the place I really want to – the chest. Always the way it is, hence I let myself get bigger to hide the damn breasts in the first place.
Other news, I received a letter of diagnosis from the psychiatrist I have been seeing. Unbeknown to me he is a TG specialist and confirms I am and have been experiencing gender dysphoria and meet the diagnostic criteria for transexuallism. He recommends treatments to make the physical appearance congruent with my male ‘sexual’ identity commence as soon as possible. Okay I am not happy with sexual identity as it is gender identity, sexual identity is something completely different but it is the confirmation I have been waiting for so I ain’t complaining any.
Again I want to say a big thank you to all of you who read and support me with messages and comments. You do make a huge difference.
Love and light
And a little bit of 80’s nostalgia because I like it